This chapter was mainly written for professionals or those who intend
to be so, of the wide domain of services to the souls and bodies of
people. It is specially intended for those among them, who would like to
become professional or semi-professional trainers in the General Sensate
Focusing Technique. However, if you are a new or even an experienced
focuser, a reader who has exercised steps and tactics of the previous
chapter or only a curious reader, you can still profit from the reading
of this chapter.
Though focusing training can be done by following this book alone,
the company of a more experienced focuser or a professional one can help
considerably. Their contribution is most valuable for one on his first
steps to acquire the strange habits of attending systematically to the
felt sensations of the body.
When the coach is himself a novice to the technique but is
experienced in one of the care-giving vocations, he can still help a
lot. The contributions he can provide in the first stages of training,
and later, to advancement in the implementation of the new knowledge are
many. Even if the other person himself is a novice to focusing, he can
put to good use his general knowledge and experience in guiding,
counseling, training etc. If the new coach is experienced in treating
the emotional system of clients - physically or mentally - it would be
easier for him and his trainees if he combined the old and the new
knowledge.
The focusing technique does not render psychology obsolete, nor does
it make professional psychologists and other professionals dealing with
the emotional system redundant. There are many conventional professions,
non-conventional ones (especially of the "alternative methods and
treatments") and others where their professionalism is in doubt, which
influence the trashy programs of the other, even if they do not know
that they are doing so, or how they do it. Each has its own approach,
techniques and purposes, and each has its own belief, theory, rationale
and rationalizations in which their truth value is not a precondition to
partial successes.
There is still good use to be made of the professional knowledge and
experience of all of these, even when a focuser can do things for
himself or help others as a layman. The help of these experts can be
carried out even when the professional's knowledge and practice are not
up-to-date. The more orthodox professional and the less orthodox
practitioner of the "alternative" treatments could both do their things
better if they would only integrate the focusing approach and tactics
with their older practice.
In this chapter, we will explain the most
important ways in which the new focuser may be helped by others. Before
introducing the guidelines and recommendations to the "pure focusing
coach" (who does not have to be a professional or semi-professional)
here are the essential recommendations for the various specialists.
I. General recommendations for professionals
- 1)
- Do not try to sell to others a commodity you have never tried
yourself. If the focusing approach or part of its technique appeals to
you, try them first on yourself (with or without a coach). It is easier
to teach someone something you know, even if the knowledge is slight.
Even if you believe - like us - that the best way to learn is by
teaching, it is still better and easier to do this after having had some
practical experience. Even the most naive trainee will discern if your
knowledge is merely theoretical.
- 2)
- Do not feel obliged to implement more than is convenient for you or
more than your specific role allows, permits or requires. Even if it does
not seem to you as appropriate to explain to your client the rationale of
the focusing or to advise him to practice it as a whole, there are still
many options available.
- For instance, the reflexologist, the masseuse, the physiotherapist,
the teacher of "gymnastics for health", and all those that are involved
with the physical side or aspects of the body, can adhere to the old
role, and only add some aspects of the focusing technique. For instance,
one can content oneself with a suggestion given to the client to focus on
specific bodily sensations of physical origin or on other related felt
sensations, in specific instances, all through the sessions or even in
between sessions. (Adhering to a level that parallels the practical side
of the first few steps for the beginner, without any theoretical or other
explanation.)
- As a professional you can integrate the directives of focusing into
your old role and techniques, keeping them relatively intact without the
need of the client to be wise to it. One can start with the systematic
suggestions of elements of the focusing technique to those one treats.
Highest on the list for those who apply physical treatments is the
suggestion to concentrate on the feelings and sensations aroused in the
relevant muscles or organs, at various points, during their sessions.
This elementary level - with minor adaptations - is applicable to all the
other professionals who deal with the mind. The psychiatrists, the
psychologists, the social workers, various kinds of counselors, teachers,
nurses, specialists of interpersonal relations... and all those who deal
with shaping the "soul" of the individual. They could merely suggest to
their clients (or patients) to pay close attention to their own felt
sensations, aroused there and then during the session.
- An additional suggestion may be added by both kinds of professionals
to the first one, without changing their noncommittal level of
implementation of the focusing technique. The professional could suggest
to his clients that they pay attention to the same focused or hazy felt
sensations, of muscles, of organs or of other locations, first
experienced within the treatment, outside it too. He could suggest doing
this in specific situations or whenever they are felt in life generally.
- 3)
- The accumulated professional knowledge, of all those who apply these
different kinds of treatment, guidance and therapy does not become
obsolete over night, although parts of it may need to be overhauled
urgently. At least part of it is worth integrating into the new technique
as it is. Other important parts can be adapted without too much effort or
change.
- Those professionals who are willing, but not in a position to change
the content of their sessions and their procedures overnight, can do it
gradually. They would be able to see how, what, when, and while working
with whom, to integrate the focusing tactics and strategies with the
older techniques.
- 4)
- A few professionals could implement the focusing technique and
integrate it within their own professions in a roundabout way: though
focusing is historically a late development of the trend for getting in
touch with one's feelings and emotions, it does not have to be so for
the new focusers. One could start by "arranging" for the client the
experience of focusing on a substantial felt sensation till it dissolved
and only later build on this.
- The professionals who choose this approach, can start to coach a few
trainees in focusing according to the schedule of chapter five, in a non
formal context and fashion, and gradually integrate it into their
professional knowledge. The introduction of focusing does not even have
to be under the label of treatment for emotional problems.
- It is usually easier to introduce the focusing technique as a
procedure for reallocation of one's brain resources, for the upgrading
and mending of the activation programs involved with the current felt
sensations or other concrete daily problems. Just as the the guiding of
others in the building of a healthy diet, is not medical treatments, but
preventive measures, so can be the training in the use of the General
Sensate Focusing technique (and so one can present it).
- 5)
- The best use a professional could make of his knowledge and insights
when coaching a trainee is not by sharing them with the focuser. While
the various tactics of the focusing technique are not yet integrated as
habits into the life of a person, it is better that the bulk of the
knowledge remain with the coach. It could be used by him - and for the
best results - as a source of ideas or projects offered to the trainee
or themes to be emphasized in the future.
For instance, when a professional of the physical treatments knows the
relationship of a felt sensation encountered by the trainee to that of a
complicated physical system, he could suggest he begins work on another
part of that system, without bringing a detailed explanation. In the same
way, when a psychologist thinks that the encountered felt sensation is
related to the Oedipus complex, he could suggest to the trainee to focus
on felt sensations aroused in him by the photograph of the relevant
parent. Both can defer the detailed explanation for a later opportunity,
if not rendered obsolete by later developments.
- 6)
- When people encounter intentional focusing for the first time, they
usually react with funny feelings, and even more so, when it is suggested
that they participate. Usually, those mixed feelings arise from their
more general trend to resist direct suggestions, and from the more
specific trash-programs of our western culture which are prejudiced
against the allocation of attention to the felt sensations of the body.
- There are two main approaches that may be taken to overcome this
obstacle:
The first one involves teaching focusing as one would for trainees of
sensate focusing. The second and more recommended one is to start
asking during treatment, in an offhand way or in a matter of fact fashion,
what the client is feeling at that moment. When the answer does not include a
verbal or other description of a felt sensation, one can ask him about
the sensations of the body felt at the moment - those related and those
that do not seem to be related to the feelings.
- 7)
- In any context, the best opportunity to introduce the focusing
technique is when the "candidate" complains about an unpleasant felt
sensation he is experiencing at that time. With a bit of luck, the
question of "where does it feel the worst?" and the suggestion to "try
to concentrate on it for a while, before you give me a detailed
description of it" will cause him to have a short focusing, and bring
about a certain relief or a shift of the original felt sensation
elsewhere or even its termination.
It is better not to leave the astonished client to digest his
experience alone. A short explanation will soften his embarrassment and
contain his wonder. After a few successful encounters with focusing, if
he is not overwhelmed by too many and too early explanations, the
introduction of focusing as a technique or tactic, and the continuation
of its use, will be a lot easier.
Whether within formal or informal situations, it is always better to
ask "where do you feel?" rather than "what do you feel?" or the worst
"why wouldn't you focus on it?". The direct suggestion or advice of
"focus on it" is best restricted to situations where a specific felt
sensation is the subject of conversation between the coach and the
trainee, or when it is related to a problem contemplated in a focusing
session. Otherwise, a blunt directive of this kind is bound to arouse
resistance, even if rapport has already been established.
II. The main body of the guide to the focusing "coach"
A general introduction
People who wish to begin learning the focusing technique and contact
you will be at different levels of knowledge, as well as having very
different ideas about the help they require. Misunderstandings about the
roles you are willing to fill are better dealt with in the first
session. Following are typical situations and problems, and the
recommended ways to treat them:
- 1)
- The new trainee may know another focuser from whom he has heard
various details about the focusing technique, or have got a text
describing it - perhaps he has even tried it before.
- The best thing to do is to question him about the knowledge he
already has, and about his previous focusing experience. You can then
assess what is the most suitable approach to this specific trainee, and
where to begin his training.
- 2)
- The new trainee got your phone number from somebody or from a
publication, but does not know anything more about the technique than
the rudimentary facts, i.e. that it differs from conventional
psychotherapy and that it is a mainly nonverbal treatment for problems.
- The best approach is to start with a short explanation about the
activation programs (of the brain). About those that execute our
decisions to initiate physical activities, like walking, scratching an
itch or working with tools; and about the mental ones that do our
thinking for us, like those that multiply four by three.
- Then, explain the basic role of the natural biofeedback processes as
a "manager" of all our bodily and mental activities, and the function of
the felt sensations as regulators of attention. Compare "their request
for attention" to the toddler who pulls his mother's apron to get her
attention. The last point in the introduction is the explanation of the
relationship between the focusing on a felt sensation, and the mending,
updating and upgrading of the various activation programs related to it.
- 3)
- The person who calls knows nothing about the technique, but has
heard that you can help him: it is worth telling him even on the phone
that you are teaching the focusing technique, and not practicing any of
the conventional psychotherapies; that you are pleased he has called but
he better think (for a moment or a while) if he is open to
unconventional ways.
- It is still not uncommon for people who are not well acquainted with
the "miracles" happening to focusers, to lack a sufficiently open a mind
for the focusing technique. It is better to tell them beforehand what to
expect in order to save many misunderstandings and
disappointments. Thanks to a proper explanation given in time, even
those who do not guess what they had bargained for, can get over the
surprise and embarrassment and become diligent focusers.
- 4)
- And there are of course those who always know better, even among
those who know a good deal about focusing. Most of these are people with
a long experience as patients of psychotherapists. They will try to
place you in the role of conventional therapist, so that they may be
able to take the role of the patient. The best remedy is to tell the
trainee that you feel things are developing towards this kind of
relation. Then, if you are not a trained (or licensed) psychotherapist,
the best way out of this trap is to tell the trainee that you are not
one, and return to the focusing schedule.
If you are still an active therapist or have retired from practice,
you will have to explain and even stress the reason you are seeing him
as a trainee and not as a patient. You will also have to make the
frustration of his urges more gradual, and to be strong enough not to
yield to his regressive wishes.
The first focusing sessions
The first introductory words and sentences can be crucial for the
novice focuser. The experience of a few successes - even small ones - in
the first session will give the training a good start. These successes
are also essential as they are examples of the "homework" required
between the first and second meetings. The actual transactions of the
first session, which are a unique combination of explanations and
exercises, are made by you in real time, to suit yourself and the
general personality of the new trainee and his resources.
This can easily be done according to the actual dialog, even if you
know nothing about him beforehand. However, it is better if you can find
out a few things about the new trainee before you receive him. Remember!
prejudice is better than ignorance!!! It is usually easier to mend than
to create from scratch.
The following suggestions will be arranged according to the various
steps of chapter 5., headed "do it yourself, now!" The coach can recite
their main directives and the explanations of each or discuss them in
his own words. He can adhere to their order and content or do his own
variations and digressions. However, he would do better to deliver their
content in accordance with the development of the specific session with
the specific trainee.
The first step of the first stage (chapter 5 section II)
After the first few introductory sentences, the time is now ripe for
the first focusing. The aim of this step is to introduce gradually the
habit of allocating a prolonged and concentrated attention to the
spontaneous mild or weak felt sensations. The usual question is: "where
do you feel now?".
The most common problem is that the trainee answers a different
question or he finds it hard to believe that you really want the answer
to this question and not other information. Once you are over this
stage, warn him that sometimes focusing on a felt sensation can increase
its intensity for a while. Then tell him to focus for a few seconds on a
felt sensation of his choice. Then, suggest to him to begin the first
step of chapter 5.
There are a few common problems at this point, which you can, and
have to, surmount before further steps can be taken:
The most discouraging problem, encountered frequently at the
beginning, but also in later stages, is that the trainee says he does
not feel anything at all, not even a tiny bit of sensation in his
body. The most probable factors responsible for this - each by itself or
in combination with the others are:
- a)
- The new trainee is a regular "leveler" or does not discern any
sensation or a diffuse feeling because of the circumstances.
- b)
- The trainee does not have any intense sensation and does not believe
that you really want him to focus on the mild sensation he has at the
margin of awareness.
- c)
- The combination of the weakness of sensations, the habit of ignoring
them and the difficulty encountered by the untrained while trying to
focus on them, results in his saying "I cannot focus on any sensation".
- d)
- The trainee had not included in the reasons for his application a
complaint about physical or emotional unpleasant feelings, nor were
they the reasons for his contacting you, he does not suffer from one at
the session, and finds it hard to grasp the relation between his
"psychological problems" and his body.
With trainees of this kind, it takes a more intense sensation than
the pressure of their bottom on the furniture to convince them that they
always have, on the margin of awareness, a potential felt
sensation. Usually many hesitate even to try to search in their body for
a felt sensation. If the prolonged concentrated attention allocated to
the bodily sensations, and the short journey through the body listed in
the first step does not work, you have a problem.
The following means can be applied in various combinations in order
to solve this problem. It is recommended that you try to introduce them
during the first session even if the trainee does not have any problem,
at that time, to attend to sensations:
- a)
- The easiest way to demonstrate a sensation is to ask the trainee to
make a fist and then to relax it while attending to the sensations
involved. Then direct his attention to sensations of the body related to
his seat and combine it with the explanation about the incessant input of
the sensorium of the body which is always there, even while one is not
attending.
- b)
- "Opening the nape of the neck" is the second best remedy for this
problem. So, ask the trainee to lean his head slightly backward, against
a wall or any other suitable object. Afterwards, for a few minutes
continue with the conversation and give the trainee a general
explanation about the opening of the nape and its expected effects.
- Then, ask the trainee again about any felt sensation he can discern.
If even this is not enough, suggest he enlarge gradually the opening of
the nape up to the maximum. In this position, no-one ever missed having
at least a mild sensation of itching somewhere or uneasiness at the nape
of the neck.
- c)
- Even at this preliminary stage, the recitation of self-provocations
can be introduced. However, it is not recommended to use it without due
explanation. At this early stage, the paradoxical approach embedded in
the instruction to the trainee to say "I do not feel any sensation in my
body" or any other mild sentence will surely bring him a felt
sensation. But, it might also give him the feeling or suspicion that he
is being manipulated by hypnotic suggestions.
- Only if the mild ones like the above or "nothing bothers me" and "every
thing is all right" bring only faint sensations that are difficult to
focus on, try gradually to introduce more juicy ones.
- In the explanations about this tactic it is worth dwelling on the
decentralization of the subsystems of the brain and the emotional system.
Include the distinction between the "infantile" emotional system of the
right half of the brain and the more "mature" verbal, analytical and
logical subsystems of the left half.
- Even on the first use of the provocation it is essential to stress the
difference between the multi-repetition of a nasty declaration which
harms a lot, and the one time recitation followed by a switch to
focusing, that is like a "homeopathic" treatment.
A common problem at this stage (and with some trainees all through
the training) is that the trainee complains that he did succeed in
"getting in touch" with (focus on) a felt sensation, but then it
disappeared, and no other felt sensation is present. You can treat it as
a milder version of the previous problem with the same remedy.
The following problem is the opposite of the previous two. It
happens sometimes, that the trainee is flooded with emotions, felt
sensations or other bodily sensations, and says that he cannot settle on
any one in particular or does not like to, because it is so
unpleasant. Here the remedy is a bit harder to achieve. The trainee is
at a loss. He cannot or will not concentrate his attention for more than
a few seconds on any of them. The following can be suggested to him:
- a)
- Suggest various changes in his posture with the intention of "shutting
the nape of the neck" - exactly opposite to those of opening it.
- b)
- A matter-of-fact suggestion to make a fist and concentrate on the
tension there, will, after a short time, calm him enough and he will then
regain his ability to concentrate.
- c)
- One of the two intense tactics of "trimming" the sensations to a
suitable measure will most probably succeed where nothing else helps -
rubbing of the palms of the hands against each other or the application
of the vibrations of any small electric appliance (vibrators included).
The new trainee has a strong headache, tooth-ache, back ache or
any other strong pain that "covers" all other potential felt sensations.
This pain can be used for the focusing part of the training but usually
does not supply a swift relief, significant changes in quality or a
shift. Usually, "rubbing the palms of the hands" diminishes the strong
pain and supplies both the proof that the new technique works, and the
experience of actively changing the felt sensation within
oneself. Nearly always a few repetitions of this act, brings about a
decline in the stubborn felt sensation and more suitable alternatives
emerge.
Very often, trainees complain during the first steps of the
beginning session about various kinds of distractions. It also happens a
lot with certain kinds of more advanced trainees (obsessives mostly). In
nearly all cases, intruding thoughts are the cause for it. Whenever this
disturbance occurs, suggest to the trainee to use the "semantic
satiation" tactic of repeating a word or a syllable.
Though new trainees are usually too shy to talk about it, the new
experience of attending to the felt sensations embarrasses them. The
relatively swift decline which occurs in the sensation focused on, even
aggravates the embarrassment.
Therefore, the first few times the trainee
has this experiences, patiently go over the rationale again and
again. Share with him your remembered feelings of "magic" at this stage
of your training. Accompany him on the search for the location of the
sensations of embarrassment to be used as focusing targets.
These, and
the accumulation of experiences of shifts which occur while focusing on
a felt sensation, helps the trainee to develop trust in you and in the
new technique.
Share with him your feelings of "absurdity" which arise
from the almost too speedy success of the focusing technique in changing
the quality of the felt sensation focused on, and in solving the
relevant problems.
(Even after thirty years of successfully focusing on headaches, seven
years of training others in the new technique and three years of
intensively experiencing focusing on a plethora of felt sensations - I
still have, from time to time, a queer felt sensation of magic -
especially when I am both responsible for and witness to dramatic shifts
and changes in felt sensations that occur to new trainees.)
One of the most basic rules for training others in the art of
focusing is the provision of a suitable sitting position for the
trainee. It is almost mandatory to have him sitting with a good support
so that it will take only a slight movement to recline his head
comfortably. It is recommended that the coach have the same kind of
sitting facility so he may provide the trainee with a model to emulate
and a common base for the emerging feelings of a focusing
fraternity. Doing this will also make it easier for you to be with him
in this position, and talk about the discomfort embedded in it.
While the trainee is focusing, it is recommended that you pay
attention to his nonverbal communications - facial expressions and
others. It is also worth asking him where his target is, so that you be
able to parallel his focusing. Explain to him that he can opt not to
divulge it, but it will help you to be with him if you can focus on the
same place. This will establish the procedure of repeatedly asking the
trainee where he is focusing.
Whenever the trainee is focusing on a target silently, for more than
half a minute, ask him what is going on there with regard to the various
parameters of the sensation on which he is focusing. This will diminish
the danger of the trainee digressing and becoming absorbed in reveries -
or the opposite - entering too early and too deeply into very
problematic emotional contents.
The following steps (the second to fifth)
These are crucial steps. They are taken mainly to ensure the new
trainee having a prolonged focusing on a felt sensation, and
experiencing the first success of a shift in the quality and intensity
of a felt sensation - during focusing and as a result of it. This and
the ones that follow are the real base for the building of the new
focusing habit.
The instructions in these steps are mostly given to the trainee
parallel to his focusing efforts. They are supposed to enhance his
concentration powers and direct them to the chosen point. During these
steps many of the trainees are going to have their first deliberate
prolonged focusing on a felt sensation - something which has probably
never happened before in their life without being forced to do so by an
acute physical pain. Though these steps are relatively short (to evade
boredom), the majority of the trainees will have a few successful shifts
of felt sensations while doing them.
If the shifts happen too fast and for too trivial felt sensations,
suggest that the trainee lean his head back (on the available support)
in order to recover the lost felt sensations.
If the shift in the experience is significant (with regard to the
surprise or alleviation of suffering resulting from it), stress to the
trainee that what he has just experienced is the core of the focusing
technique. Stress again and again that the nature of the trash-programs
is such, that there is no simple relation between the suffering or
disturbance they cause, and the focusing effort needed in order to
update, improve or mend them.
This may be a most suitable point to
stress the difference between the effort of the structured focusing on
the felt sensations originating from trash-programs (in order to mend
them), and the various trends of Yoga and Meditation which strive to
clear all contents of the awareness in order to achieve Nirvana.
The sixth step
This step sums up the first session of the focusing training. In this
step, the trainee who has not experienced a shift of the felt sensation
or at least a significant weakening of it during previous steps, is
supposed to feel one now. If he did not experience a shift during
previous steps, it is crucial to supply him with one at this step "at
all costs".
In order to make this step effective, while giving him the
instructions of this section, be sure he is focusing all the time on one
felt sensation or another. To ensure it and to make it less difficult
for him, ask him often where he is focusing. If not even one sensation
is available for his focusing, suggest that he opens the nape of the
neck. If no significant shift and no positive change has happened to any
of the felt sensations of the trainee, try to achieve it by one of the
following "means justified by the end".
There are a few tactics available, when tackling a stubborn felt
sensation, and only very seldom does one of these sensations defy all
tactics*:
- ___________________
- *
- The new technique is "nearly omnipotent". Whenever you meet an
obstacle keep this fact in mind. "Opening the nape of the neck" and
other tactics presented in previous chapters always succeed in forcing
the reluctant supra-programs to bring a sensation which is worth
focusing on to the center of awareness. So it is with rubbing the hands
or other tactics a focuser can use in order to dispel an intense and
stubborn sensation. There are, indeed, a few means to overcome all other
obstacles - including the ones which already mentioned (or better ones
you can invent yourself). However, keep in mind that it is not always
worth overcoming an obstacle. Many times it might be wiser to go around
it or defer the encounter to a more suitable opportunity.
- -------------------
- a)
- Ask the trainee to increase his concentration on the felt sensation
and to describe in great detail what it is.
- b)
- Suggest he use the light touch of his palms against each other to
enhance his concentration.
- c)
- If the target sensation is not in a place too inconvenient to touch,
ask him to put a finger on the region of the felt sensation.
- d)
- Suggest that he find in the vicinity of the felt sense a muscle which
he can grasp, pinch, or squeeze to increase temporarily the felt
sensation.
- e)
- If the sensation is very stubborn, which is frequently so with those
that are chronic or semi-chronic, and if the nearly impossible occurs,
and none of the previous tactics help even after a few minutes have
passed, continue with the repeated and enlarged explanation about the
natural biofeedback processes that are working on the problem. Tell
the trainee that, sometimes, the focusing on a felt sensation till it
changes involves a thorough overhaul of the relevant programs, the
completion of which takes a prolonged period of time.
Point to the fact that the mending mechanisms continue to work on a
problem on the margin of the awareness even after one ceases to pay full
attention to it. Add the reassurance that the efforts dedicated to the
mending of a program has an accumulative affect and one is not bound to
solve a problem in one trial only. Then, without committing yourself too
much, tell him that after a few trials in that same session he may
overcome it. Then suggest to him to focus on another felt sensation.
- After the preliminary preparations for retreat are completed, it is
worth checking if the dominant sensation is really covering all other
ones or whether weaker ones are also available. Even if there are other
alternative sensations and even if the focusing on them brings about
substantial results, it is still most important to encounter frequently
the stubborn one previously abandoned in a tactical retreat. As long as
the session continues, return from time to time to check on the stubborn
felt sensation. In most cases, even the most stubborn ones yield in the
end.
- f)
- If half the session has passed and no significant change has occurred
in the stubborn felt sensation, it is time for the sixth and decisive
tactic:
- 1)
- Suggest the trainee use the intensive rubbing of the palms against
each other* while focusing on the stubborn felt sensation.
- __________________
- *
- The application of this tactic is usually restricted to emergency
situations. It is recommended for use in combination with the focusing
on the felt sensation even when its causes are "purely" physical or
physiological. Even if the direct contributors to its initial emergence
are only physiological, this does not last so for more than a few
seconds as various trash-programs join the arena. The additional
focusing resources will help to bring relief of the unpleasant sensation
and one and the same time improve the trash- programs involves.
- ------------------
- 2)
- Postpone the explanations of this act for about a quarter to half
a minute so the trainee will experience a complete surprise.
- 3)
- Explain to the trainee how this flooding of the subsystem, which
creates and analyzes the sensations, affect it.
Postponing the explanations has two purposes: first, to provide him
with a surprising success which will surely boost his morale lowered as
a result of the previous unsuccessful encounters with the
sensation. Second, to prevent a suspicion by both trainee and coach,
that the alleviation of the suffering was the result of a hypnotic
suggestion.
Even if the coach is proficient in the use of hypnosis it is better
to refrain from using it at this stage. The experience of self-control
and self-management are vital for the building of the group of
supra-programs which constitute the trainee's habit of using the general
sensate focusing technique. At this stage, the use of short cuts is
bound to lengthen the distance to the target or even prevent its
attainment.
As the said sensation starts to fade, it is worth recommending the
trainee to use this tactic whenever the felt sensations are extremely
unpleasant or when he wishes to change the felt sensation available for
focusing. It is worth taking into consideration and stressing to the
trainee that the contribution of the palm rubbing to the amendment of
programs is scant, as it merely floods the relevant subsystems with
surplus input. However, it is useful as a methodological aid and as a
means of quickly changing the emotional climate if one wishes to do so.
When one uses this tactic against unbearable felt sensations which
are also stubborn, it sometimes takes a few repetitions with short
pauses of a minute or two between them. Till now, none of the reluctant
felt sensations, or any other sensation of a "pure" physiological
origin, have succeeded in defying this weapon. It always achieves an
alleviation in the felt sensation of the moment, even if it is only a
partial and fleeting one.
Summary of the first session
Usually, in the first session, it is better to stay within the
confines of the six steps for the beginner. Even with trainees who have
preliminary experience with focusing, expediting the training does not
pay. The first session starts the building of mutual trust and
partnership between coach and trainee.
Therefore, it is better not to go
too far before consolidating them. For the same reason it is recommended
to look at the end of this session for a convenient "preliminary
contract" for these relations. In the same mood it is important to
discuss the gap between the trainee's expectations of the first session
and what really occurred.
The end of the session is the best time for discussing
"democratically" the possible "homework" the trainee can do before the
second session. At the end of the session, it is recommended to tell the
trainee that if he does his part, which is focusing between sessions on
15% to 30% of the potential felt sensations entering the center of his
awareness, he is going to have a significant break through.
It is recommended to tell him (again) at the end of this and the next few
sessions about the firm connection between this kind of focusing, and
the three promised occurrences of a breakthrough i.e. those of the
first, second and third months.
It is also recommended giving the trainee a printout (or photocopy)
of chapter five of this book. Suggest he read and practice the relevant
parts whenever not engaged in other activities. Though most of the
trainees do not comply with this suggestion, it is still worth trying as
it serves both those who comply and those who do not.
The resistance to complying, the discussion about it in the following
sessions and the leniency of the coach will contribute their share to
the establishment of a relationship in which the trainee is an
autonomous agent. The assurance you will give the "truant" trainee, on
the second session, that not complying was not a "major crime" will
contribute to the democratization of the coach-trainee relations.
The following sessions
General routines
At the beginning of each session, it is recommended to start by the
trainee's listing of his felt sensations of the moment. Then suggest he
briefly focuses on one or a few of them in a row, till a shift
occurs. Then comes the vital part of reviewing the "homework" done
between sessions.
It has been found that with many trainees, both the
spontaneous talkers and those who do not talk much, a review of those
focusings and the main felt sensations occurring since the previous
session is the best tactic.
This habit provides the unstructured procedure of the focusing
session with a rudimentary structure to fall back on when needed. The
coach can draw from the narration of the trainee ideas for future
homework and projects, provocations and other recycling tactics for use
both in the session and out of it, various tactics and even a
strategy.
Sometimes, the coach may rely on his or the trainee's free
associations arising from the content of the narration, to decide on
focusing targets. They can even rely on psychological knowledge and
creativity as a means to this end.
And as usual, some of the trainees tend to get into a power struggle
with the coach about the schedule of work during the session. Others,
may be very excited and anxious to share the experiences or problems of
the week, immediately at the beginning of the session. As with other
cases of breach of schedule, compromises are preferred. Go along with
the trainee, but make short interruptions, breaks and pauses in his
narration with suggestions to focus briefly on the most important felt
sensations or provocations suggested by you.
While reviewing the felt sensations and the focusing on them,
trainees talk about various topics. The best a coach (who is not
integrating focusing with psychotherapy) can do with them is to use them
as targets for focusing. The trainee may be advised to focus on the felt
sensation of the moment of the narration - the one that was aroused
during the talk, or to try to focus on the original ones (of the
episodes mentioned) - revived by one of the various available tactics
for "recycling" felt sensations of past experiences.
When trainee narrations take up a high portion of the session, it is
often wise to go along with them rather than fight this tendency. In
these cases it is wise to introduce the allegory about the yacht which
cruises on a lake full of fish for pleasure. The narration is like the
cruising yacht, which drags a fishing net often hauled on board full of
fish. The haulings are the interruptions suggested by the coach at key
points of the narration, in order to focus on the concurrent felt
sensations.
As the focusing session deals with contents which are not part of the
usual daily rapport, it is highly recommended to show the trainee that
he is understood. It is also important to assure him time and again that
all felt sensations are legitimate topics as all of them are legitimate
targets for focusing.
Frequently, especially when training is prolonged, feelings that are
not of a "pure" trainee-coach relations emerge. Sometimes, even at the
beginning of training intense feelings are aroused. In all of them, the
worst tactic is to delve into them or dwell on them. Even if no acting
out of yours or the trainee stems from it, trash-programs related to
other people and relations will surely emerge into active functioning
and hinder the training. The best way of dealing with the irrelevant
feelings is to focus on felt sensations of each of them until they fade.
During the first few sessions and even during the advanced stages of
the training, the best contribution for morale and diligence in focusing
is derived from success. Therefore, it is best to divide the efforts of
the coach equally, between the search for new focusing targets (topics
and tactics) for the trainee, and the emphasis on the success already
achieved.
The tempo of introducing the technique
The first few weeks are dedicated mainly to overcoming the most
urgent problems of the trainee. During this period, introduce him to the
tactics most needed for this task. If he is reading the text of chapter
five, point out to him the sections most relevant at that time.
After the trainee starts to overcome the most stressing problems and
the most distressing felt sensations, it is time to look at the more
advanced targets to be reached by focusing. The specific targets chosen
will dictate the selection of the tactics and techniques from the book
(and experience) as well as the order of their introduction.
Usually, during the first two months, the trainee is supposed to
experience the use of all the tactics and to have a project or two that
goes beyond the alleviation of unpleasant felt sensations. In the
following months, the projects selected and the tactics to try in
overcoming them represent team work - and they had best be "the most
democratic" possible.
In addition to my prejudice against authoritative relations, there
are also pragmatic reasons for this recommendation. The coach may
suggest projects and even try "to sell them to the trainee". However
"the last word" should remain with the trainee, as he is the only one
who is in direct unconscious touch with his activation programs and
stored memories. Consequently, only he can receive their warnings and
recommendations regarding the time to tackle the various problems.
Only by taking these as a dominant part of the considerations about the
appropriateness of the decisions, can one refrain from gross mistakes
and from arousing the "resistance" of the trainee.
Even if the trainee makes many incorrect decisions while managing his
daily focusing programme, too much pressure on him "may win a few
battles, but will lose the war". The feeling of being his own master and
the only one responsible for his focusing programme is very good for his
morale and enthusiasm.
The mutual agreement that the proficiency of the
coach and his somewhat more objective point of reference, are only some
of the factors to be considered, circumvent most of the "transference"
problems so common in psychotherapy. The mutual agreement that the gut
feelings of the trainee should decide what, when, for how long, and if
at all, to focus on any target or project contributes immensely to the
emotional climate in which the focusing training functions.
Only in such
an atmosphere will the trainee allocate the maximal share of possible
resources to his focusing and his growth.
If the atmosphere of good teamwork is preserved, the coach can
motivate, persuade, or coax the trainee to focus on some of the targets
which he regards as essential and the trainee initially is reluctant to
tackle.
Remember, the coach is only there to help the trainee to learn
quickly and more easily the steps of the "do it yourself" manual. You
should only supply him with an external point of view and a temporary
second mind, to be used while he is contemplating the best ways open to
him (for focusing purposes).
Though the trainee will tend to treat you
as a parent figure, it is better to evade this. The best you can do for
him is to play the role of a fellow traveler and a coach.
Whenever you
ask the trainee to think or focus or make experimentations, use the
minor suggesting tone, that is as far as possible away from an
authoritative tone. Make your suggestions as open to refusal as
possible. This way, you minimize the dangers of both excessive
compliance and exhausting "resistance".
Beware of suggestions that make the trainee too compliant - he may
lose his enthusiasm and diminish his vital selectivity in taking your
advice. Remember, you are only a temporary guest in the trainee's life
and soul - not his partner or a permanent tenant.
Do not forget to focus on your own felt sensations - the ongoing ones
and those which emerge as a result of the developments during sessions
and between them, especially those related to trainees. This will
diminish the effects of "counter-transference" and other trash-programs
which may hinder the focusing training and your general emotional
climate.
Hints and tips
Remember to review sporadically the tactics used by the trainee and
the problems he is tackling. Often, one gets into the habit of using a
restricted number of tactics applied to restricted areas of his
life. Though it might be wise to do this during certain periods and in a
crisis, the patterns should be broken each time the circumstances change
- and this happens very often.
As part of the effort to change the opinion of the trainee about the
felt sensations of the body, stress that their nature is first and
foremost a kind of notice from the emotional subsystem to the awareness,
and their quality as pleasant or unpleasant is only secondary. Thus,
suggest to him that it is better to prolong the focusing on each of the
felt sensations for the longest duration possible and curtail only those
that are not needed at the time of their occurrence.
Even experienced trainees tend to disregard the fact that the main
contribution of the focusing is their intensification of the updating,
mending and upgrading of the programs involved. From this point of view,
the prolongation of a felt sensation contributes more than the hastening
of its fading.
Company facilitates attention allocation. Stress this to the trainee
who skips sessions. Stress this also to the one who complains about the
insufficient effort made by him between sessions and the "shallowness"
of his focusings while doing homework.
Stress the difference between the focusing on the felt sensation
while being in a strong emotional state, and the expression of it or
acting impulsively because of that felt sensation. It is important to
communicate frequently the notion that everything qualifies for internal
focusing, even if it is inappropriate to act upon it, or to share it
with others.
It is essential to show the trainee that he can learn to make the
distinction between the various components of the emotional processes
i.e. to sever the automatic ties and connections between the
experiential component of emotion (including that of the tendency to
act), and the behavioral or expressive components.
If needed, dedicate considerable effort to pondering this topic and
the recycling of related felt sensations. This is especially important
for the levelers who exclude too many emotions, sensations and contents
related to them from their awareness - lest they lose control and act
upon them. It is also essential for the sharpeners who are often flooded
by certain emotions and tend to act impulsively on their behalf. It is
most important for those who oscillate between these two modes.
At every opportunity, convey the confidence that any felt sensation
one can focus on is always a blessing, as it is a chance to update and
mend the trashy programs that aroused it. Whenever a trainee describes
an intense unpleasant feeling that has defied his focusing attempts,
convey your sympathy. Assure him that the gains derived from focusing
are as high as the price paid in focusing effort - independent of the
alleviation in the felt sensation (derived most of the time as a token
reward for the diligent focuser). Then remind him that the best results
are those derived from focusing on moderate felt sensations.
Whenever the trainee introduces a new theme, whether by contemplation
or by description of a felt sensation, emphasize these themes as new
horizons awaiting his focusing.
When a trainee is stuck with a project that does not yield enough
felt sensations needed for regular focusing, suggest he try the
self-provoking approach, the G recycling section of chapter 5, part
IV. The most prominent on the list are the verbal exclamations that
describe the target topic - like: "I am afraid" or "I am afraid of ...."
and the paradoxical negation-sayings.
Whenever one is "hunting" for a felt sensation related to a specific
content, the negative sayings ("I am not...", I do not...", "I
never...", etc. ) might be the best means. A single recitation of one of
these, followed by a concentrated focusing is usually the fastest and
most "elegant" way of "fishing" for the right felt sensation. (It seems
that this is the best and funniest line for recruiting a felt sensation.
When one recites these exclamations to oneself silently, it works even
better than when doing it aloud.)
When, after the first few sessions, the trainee is Un-selective in his
focusing on the ongoing stream of daily experiences, gently try to
redirect him. Stress the different contributions of the various trashy
emotional supra-programs. Try to point out those that are hindering him
the most at the time. Show him that he can invite the appropriate felt
sensations to aid him in tackling these specific
trashy-programs. Explain to him how one wastes so much effort by
Un-selective investment of effort.
When a trainee complains about indecisiveness, hesitations,
ambivalence and difficulties in reaching a certain decision, demonstrate
to him the work of "the inner guide". Show him that he can initiate a
dialog with his unconsciousness and thus become "his own oracle". Show
him that he can "ask" his unconscious for an opinion on various aspects
of his life and potential acts and anticipated happenings, and then
focus on the resulting felt sensations, created by the
questions. Emphasize to him that this procedure is both an activation of
the inner guide, and a means of recruiting felt sensations to be used
through focusing to clear his path to a longed-for future.
This context is suitable for the advancement of the training of the
focuser to treat the felt sensations as a general nonverbal
communication from his mind to his awareness, and not only as a target
for focusing.
While training in the "economical talking to oneself" technique of
provocations, use positive and negative exclamations about the world,
oneself and one's emotions. Stress the advantages of this procedure
which needs less resources than other tactics, but do not fail to
mention its deficiencies.
Be as flexible as you can! there is not any "one and only way to do
the focusing" at any given moment or particular problem. So be an expert
in letting the trainee decide for himself, during the training sessions
with you as well as when you are not there. Thus the trainee will feel
more competent and treat the focusing "homework" as his own. The better
he feels during the sessions with you, the more he will remember what
you have trained him to do, and the better will be his focusing during
the week.
Do not forget to focus on your own felt sensations during coaching;
prefer to focus on those related to what is going on in the
session. Remember the mighty effect of a good model, on the learning
processes of the "modeling" type. Exploit the positive effects of
modeling to the utmost by sharing with the trainee your past and present
experiences as a focuser, and be careful not to provide a bad
example.
However, do not forget the difference between the role of a
professional coach and an intimate friend. Mixing these roles is
deleterious for the focusing training, for the morale of the trainee and
for fair interpersonal relations. It is especially important to keep
these two kinds of roles clearly separated when the trainee is an
acquaintance, a friend, a relative, or one who is involved in an
intimate relationship with you.
Beware of the over-psychologized trainee!! Many trainees have been
patients of psychotherapists, or at least know a lot about it. They have
preconceptions about their role as trainees and very often confuse it
with that of patients in therapy. If you do not frustrate them too much
or too rigidly, they will eventually yield and gradually accept their
role of trainees.
Beware of "transference"! though it is usually a part of
psychotherapy settings, it is not restricted to them. Working with a
trainee is only another kind of interpersonal relationship. Thus mutual
feelings develop. Trust and other basic emotions intensify. A certain
measure of intimacy tends to develop. And the staunch adherence to the
formal roles of trainee and coach is never kept.
Gradually, a tendency
to involve in the training relations other patterns, supra-programs, and
other activation programs may endanger the harmonious teamwork needed
for the training to succeed. Therefore, beware of this and continuously
gently but firmly push and pull the interaction toward the main roles
and away from dangerous deviations.
It seems that the best way to deal with too strong transference is to
let the trainee (and the coach) focus on the felt sensations involved,
and restrict to the minimum the verbal treatment of that topic.
However, do not treat all personal references as expressions of
"transference". Generally these are merely relevant information and
natural interpersonal communication to be expected in any team
work. Usually, "a matter of fact" response is the best reply to both
kinds of communications. Thus, it satisfies a "simple" communication as
well as neutralizing a "transferential" one. So, even if "transference"
effects are suspected, there is usually no need to clear the point or to
deal with it.
Many trainees wish to understand the roots and reasons for their
emotional and behavioral problems. Many more feel uneasy from time to
time when getting rid of problems they have never really understood. In
order to discourage the new focuser from investing too much impotent
effort in understanding the root of his trouble, certain steps have to
be taken:
a)- It is better to explain to the trainee from the start, that all the
problems he wish to deal with result from trash-programs.
- b)
- Explain to him the fact that the body (especially the brain and mind
system) knows the problems involved and their roots, in a much better way
than any verbal or other conscious thought can achieve.
- c)
- It is also recommended to advise him that the mending processes are of
an entirely different nature than any verbal or other symbolic approach.
Stress the fact that these processes are hard to explain and understand
verbally, but dealt with much better and more easily nonverbally. Use for
this explanation the detailed description of the natural biofeedback
processes.
- d)
- Assure him that, at first, all the help the mending and updating
programs and processes need and ask is to allocate to them more
attentional resources through paying attention to the felt sensations,
silently if possible.
- e)
- It is also a good policy to soothe the psychologically-oriented ones
and other intellectuals, by telling them that during the advanced steps
it will be different. Tell them that the higher thinking processes will
be recruited later too, in the service of recycling stored feelings.
- f)
- Assure him that at a later phase, when the problems start to dissolve,
or after they have been solved, it will be easier to understand them (or
rather what they were).
- g)
- Convey to him your firm stand and belief that it is easier first to
solve the problems and then try to understand them than vice versa.
When the felt sensation is hard to focus on, when it is fussy or when
the concentration powers of the trainee are too weak, try introducing
the tactic of bringing the palms together gently. If you have already
introduced this, persuade him to do it at that time without too many
explanations.
However, on its first implementation, full explanations
are needed, i.e. that this is a very old measure for the diversion of
attentional resources to internal processes; that it was discovered by
ancient cultures; that though it feels at first stupid or superstitious,
it is worth the effort needed to overcome these feelings.
If "joining the palms" is insufficient when applied alone, the
enlisting of the whole "triumvirate" of "joining the palms", "opening
the nape of the neck" and the "parting the lips" always does the trick.
Feelings of "unbearable easiness of existence" have been experienced
by many focusers. Usually it starts to happen during the third month of
training, or even earlier. It occurs rather often till the trainee get
used to the easiness of existence. It results from fast shifts achieved
during focusing on felt sensations related to unpleasant feelings and
sensations.
These uneasy feelings are especially strong when shifts
occur to chronic or semi-chronic felt sensations. Even with longer and
more arduous projects, the huge gains are out of all proportion when
compared with the effort invested... These experiences and feelings tend
to arouse the suspicion of many people, as the benefits derived from
focusing, very often seem to be too good, too fast, too easy to achieve,
to be true and permanent.
This is especially true for two kinds of trainees:
a)- Those who have never systematically tackled their emotional problems,
who were used to being flooded by almost any strong feeling which
rendered them each time helpless.
- b)
- Those who were in psychotherapy and had gained only a little for a huge
investment.
For both it is very difficult to believe in one's experience of fast
victories. It is even harder for this kind of new trainee to believe
that those successes are his own doing. Thus, it is hard for him to get
into the habit of focusing.
People who are used to being in touch with their emotions - and are
proud of it - are sometimes the hardest to convince and to initiate into
the focusing habit. They are used to attending for very short periods to
their felt sensations, and then to switching to the verbal processing
mode of thinking. Usually, after paying brief attention to their felt
sensation, very quickly they start applying their higher cognitive
processes in order to contemplate, analyze, reflect, etc. upon their
problems.
It is often startling for them to understand that they are trying too
hard and in the wrong direction. It is more startling for them to learn
that all that is needed is to pay attention to the felt sensation rather
than knock their head against the brick wall of the problem, i.e. let
the semiautomatic and quasi-effortless processes of the subconscious do
the job.
"The case of the hesitant focuser": the first experiences of focusing
on the felt sensations and achieving the first few shifts (in their
quality or location) are very easy to obtain. However, it is not so easy
to get the trainees into the habit of focusing regularly. Only very few
are really convinced that the focusing is "it" before they start
training. A few more are true optimists or fast thinkers who, after the
first few experiences of shift in the felt sensation and the problem
involved (achieved during focusing), understand that they have hit the
jackpot.
The majority are at first too skeptical to accept the results because
it is against their deep conviction that suffering is a real and serious
part of life. However, most of them are convinced and get into the habit
of focusing in the course of the first few weeks, (or quit after one or
two sessions).
Some people are very hard to convince and tax the coach's patience
immensely. Usually, though they benefit from the training (sometimes
even considerably), they go on with the training only half-heartily and
keep on harassing the coach for a long time. Nevertheless, in most
cases, their skepticism does not prevent them from having a weekly
coaching session nor from focusing regularly between sessions. At the
end of a prolonged ordeal, they do get into the habit of focusing
whole-heartily, but only after weeks and months of internal conflicts
and hesitation.
The case of the reluctant focuser: some trainees never really get to
like focusing on their felt sensations or the setting of training. Even
while using it, they do it only as if they are taking a bitter medicine.
Upon the successful completion of the regular training sessions, they
still have reservations about the technique and remain skeptical about
its feasibility. Afterwards, they use the focusing technique only when
in deep trouble, and even then, not every time.
The case of the reluctant skeptic: sometimes, the most skeptical
apply, reluctantly, to be helped through this technique only as a remedy
for intense suffering or a specific "symptom" he may have (such as
blinding headaches). With these people it is usually hard for the coach
to establish warm interpersonal relations or a feeling of teamwork or
even good rapport.
The best way of treating them is to restrict the training of focusing
to the subjectively felt sensation which is at the core of their
trouble. Though not very often, some of them, after experiencing the
first few shifts, and the alleviation of their suffering, become
enthusiastic focusers. It does not really matter if they do it at first
only because the alleviation of their specific suffering has convinced
them, or they continue with it because they dread the return of the
symptoms. They gained from your training what they really wanted in the
first place, and who has the right to judge them as being wrong!?
There are people who do not take emotions seriously. For those who do
not regard the emotional phenomena in general, and the felt sensations
specifically, as highly important, there is an urgent need to do each
act of focusing for a special reason. For them, the needed motivation is
best drawn, not from the wish to escape or terminate each single
unpleasant felt sensation, but from long-term targets of personal change
or problem solving.
The focusing "game": besides the motivation supplied by the intense
unpleasant sensations, the cessation of which is a great boon, the best
factor to motivate people to focus is the satisfaction derived from the
basic emotion of "playfulness". The tendency to playfulness is inherent
in all of us (based on a basic emotion which regulates this activity)
and can be recruited in the service of sensate focusing.
Though it seems astonishing at first, to serious people and to those
who are in deep trouble, the playful approach to focusing on the felt
sensations seems to be the most promising one. The ease of "calling for
a felt sense" by imagery or self-talk, and the ease of achieving its
shift by casual focusing (or rubbing the palms of the hands when
sensations are too intense) is a never-ending source of amusement.
The first steps in the long focusing voyage are like those of the
toddler. There is a lot of uneasiness, embarrassment, perplexity, and
indecisiveness rather than the matter of fact resolution of the later
stages. During this period, it is important to make the new focuser
highly aware of the dramatic changes experienced during the focusing
sessions. Thus, the habit becomes easier to acquire - morale and
motivation gain from this too.
* * *
* *
*
Specific (and general) suggestions, questions, complains and other positive (or
negative) feedback of readers and of new trainers are welcome. Just use the
E-Mail link
Back to the CONTENTS
To do it yourself - now
To the Daily Focusing
To the recycled emotions
To the Special projects
To the Guide for the guide
To the Emotions
What are the emotions
The activation programs
Ad hoc activation programs
Supra-Programs
The emotional Supra-Programs
The cover-programs
The trash-programs
How it really works
To the Impossible missions???
To get back ON-LINE with the
Biofeedback WITHOUT instruments
The other Home Pages:
http://members.tripod.com/~alternativ_psy
http://flag.blackened.net/ishalif/anarchy.html
The E-Mail:
ilan@shalif.com
To the TOP Back to first page
(=====BACK
